Free guide

Protecting a loved one from scams

Scams change, but most follow the same pattern: a surprise, a reason to hurry, and a request for money or personal details. Knowing the pattern is the best protection.

Short answer
Most scams follow the same pattern: a surprise, a reason to hurry, and a request for money or personal details. The best protection is a family safe word, a habit of hanging up and calling back on a known number, and never paying by gift card, wire, crypto, or cash courier.

Got a worrying call or message right now? Pause, do not pay, and see Think it was a scam? for what to do next.

Phone scams are the most common way scammers reach older adults. Read our phone scam guide and print the by the phone card.

Common scams and warning signs

Grandparent and family impersonation

A caller says they are a grandchild, child, or relative in trouble, or a lawyer or officer calling for them. They need money fast and ask your loved one not to tell anyone. The voice may even sound right, because scammers can copy a voice from short online clips.

Warning signs: Urgency, a request for secrecy, and payment by gift card, wire, cryptocurrency, or cash handed to a courier.

Government impostors: Medicare, Social Security, and IRS

A call, text, or letter claims a benefit will stop, a number is suspended, or taxes are owed, and asks for personal details or payment. Caller ID can be faked to show a real agency number.

Warning signs: Threats of arrest or lost benefits, requests for a Medicare or Social Security number, and pressure to pay right away. Real agencies usually write first and never ask for gift cards.

Tech support scams

A pop-up, call, or email says the computer has a virus or an account was hacked, and gives a number to call. The caller asks for remote access or payment.

Warning signs: A pop-up with a phone number, requests to install remote access software, and refund offers that ask for bank logins.

Romance and friendship scams

Someone met online builds a warm relationship over weeks or months, then needs money for travel, a medical bill, or an investment.

Warning signs: They cannot meet in person or on video, they move the chat off the dating site, and they eventually ask for money or for help transferring money.

Contractor and home repair scams after a fall or storm

After a fall, a storm, or a visible repair need, someone offers a quick fix, a bathroom remodel, or a grab bar installation and asks for a large deposit up front.

Warning signs: Door-to-door offers, cash-only deals, no written estimate, no license or insurance proof, and pressure to sign today.

Home title and deed fraud

Someone files false papers to claim ownership of a home or borrows against it. Homes that are paid off, empty, or owned by an older adult can be targets. Mail offering a certified copy of the deed for a large fee is a related ploy.

Warning signs: Unexpected mail about a loan, a new owner, or a property tax change. Many county recorder offices offer free property fraud alerts. Rules vary by state, so check with the county where the home is.

Real estate wire fraud during a sale

When a home is sold or bought, a scammer sends an email or text that looks like it came from the title company, attorney, or agent, with new wiring instructions for closing funds.

Warning signs: Any message that changes wiring instructions. Always call the title company or closing attorney at a number you already know before sending money.

Estate and obituary scams after a death

Scammers read obituaries and then call grieving families about a fake debt, an unpaid bill, or an insurance payout. Others use the person's identity, or target the empty home during the funeral.

Warning signs: Calls about debts you never heard of, pressure to pay from your own money, and requests for the person's Social Security number. An estate attorney can tell you what the estate actually owes.

Fake caregivers and in-home help

Someone offers in-home help at a low rate, often through an online ad, then asks for payment up front, gains access to accounts, or takes valuables.

Warning signs: No references, no background check, cash only, and requests for bank cards or online passwords.

Lottery, sweepstakes, and prize scams

A call or letter says your loved one won a prize but must pay fees or taxes first.

Warning signs: You cannot win a contest you did not enter, and real prizes never require payment to collect.

Simple ways to protect a loved one

Agree on a family safe word that only you know, and ask for it on any urgent call about money.
Use the call-back rule: hang up and call back on a number you already know, from a statement, the back of a card, or the official website.
Never pay anyone by gift card, wire, cryptocurrency, or cash handed to a courier. Legitimate businesses and agencies do not ask for these.
Name a trusted contact with their bank and investment accounts, so the bank knows who to call if something seems wrong.
Freeze their credit with each of the three credit bureaus. It is free and can be lifted when needed. USA.gov explains how.
Set up mail and phone protections: sign up for the Do Not Call Registry, turn on the phone carrier's spam blocking, and consider informed delivery or a locked mailbox for checks and statements.
Talk about scams calmly and often, without blame. Anyone can be fooled, and a loved one who feels safe telling you is better protected.

Common questions

How can I tell if a call is a scam?

Pressure to act now, a request for secrecy, and a demand for payment by gift card, wire, cryptocurrency, or cash are the clearest signs. When in doubt, hang up and call back on a number you already know.

Will Medicare, Social Security, or the IRS call and demand payment?

Real agencies usually contact people by mail first and do not demand immediate payment by gift card, wire, or cryptocurrency. If a call worries you, hang up and call the agency using the number on its official website.

What is a credit freeze?

A credit freeze stops new credit from being opened in someone's name. It is free at each of the three national credit bureaus, and it can be lifted when needed. USA.gov explains the steps.

How do I protect a home from deed fraud?

Many county recorder offices offer a free alert when a document is filed on a property. Rules vary by state, so check with the recorder or clerk in the county where the home is.

What if my loved one already sent money?

Go to the Think it was a scam? page for calm, immediate steps, starting with a call to their bank.

If money or personal information was shared, contact the bank and the official resources listed here.

Official resources

Links go to public national resources. Kinhaven is not affiliated with them.

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